Monday, 24 December 2012

Pet Hates - 10 things that annoy me about everything...

In no particular order...

1. People who breathe loudly - come on, everyone's been on a bus or train, or in a room where there's been someone who feels the need to breathe ridiculously heavily, and let out a sigh after every breath. Even if they don't have a cold. When they, do, it's worse because it sounds all snotty too!

2. The X Factor- Let's be realistic here, we only like it because of the rubbish people, because yes, they are funny, but the live shows are overrated, and losing my interest quickly. It seems to be fixed, and it's boring, and quite frankly, none of the "good ones" are actually that good! I've heard much better singers in my life, and they haven't made it. The ones that get through to the live shows are picked because they have a "story". Take Christopher Maloney for example; he followed his nan everywhere and had confidence issues, therefore he got through to the semi's when he can't even sing! However, Gary Barlow is attractive, so we'll let him off ;) Here's a picture so we can appreciate his beauty:



3. The sound of cutlery scraping across a plate - I just cannot stand it! The noise goes right through me. It's like running fingernails down a chalk board.

4. People who say you can do something, then complain- My mother's a culprit. I always get told I can audition for Drama Schools, then when I get an audition date through, or they ask for my audition fees, she complains! It's almost as bad as people who say you can do something and then don't let you...

5. People cracking their finger joints- any other body part doesn't bother me, in fact, I often crack my hips, knees, ankles, toes, wrists and back, but for some unbeknown reason, people cracking their fingers makes me shudder...

6. People that always talk about cars- Sorry, it just annoys me, because I find it boring, and don't understand how people can have conversations that last for several hours, several days a week.

<< I mean, what's the appeal guys?

7. People that eat with their mouth open- It's just common manners. Don't do it.

8. People that make noises when they eat - It's worse than seeing the food, because you can hear it mushing around in their mouth. Ew.

9. People who walk reeeaaaallly slowly in front of you- It always happens when you want to be somewhere quickly! Old people are often the culprits. Also, people who walk next to each other and take up all of the path so that you have no way of getting past them, really annoy me... just get out of the way!

10. People who believe in "end of the world" stories - It's often school children running around screaming "Oh my god, we're all going to die!!" No, we're not, shut up and look at the evidence. Number 1, the world will not end just because the Mayans didn't feel the need to write anymore numbers on their calendar. Number 2, you'd start to notice things in the sky or elsewhere sooner than a day before... such as fire in the sky, because our atmosphere would burn up. The only way our planet will explode is if we get too close to the sun. That's a long way off yet, thank you.

<< Saw this on Facebook and it made me laugh. It was captioned "Don't go to town guys, the Mayans were right!"

There are other things that annoy me, but 10 seems like a nice round number. Maybe when I think of another 10 I'll do another post.

What annoys you?

Chav Nativity

A couple of my friends performed this in our Winter Showcase for performing arts at college, and it went down a treat!

Seeing as it's Christmas "an' all that", I thought I'd share it with you all, "innit"! Enjoy!

Chav nativity
Chav nativity...

There's this bird called Mary, yeah? She's a virgin (wossat then?)

She's not married or nuffink, but she's got this boyfriend, Joe, innit? He does joinery an' that. Mary lives with him in a crib dahn Nazaref.

One day Mary meets this bloke Gabriel. She's like `Oo you lookin at?'

Gabriel just goes 'You got one up the duff, you have.'

Mary's totally gobsmacked.

She gives it to him large 'Stop dissin' me yeah? I ain't no Kappa-slapper.

I never bin wiv no one!'

So Mary goes and sees her cousin Liz, who's six months gone herself. Liz is largin' it. She's filled with spirits, Barcardi Breezers an' that.

She's like 'Orright, Mary, I can feel me bay-bee in me tummy and I reckon I'm well blessed. Think of all the extra benefits an' that we is gonna get.

'Mary goes 'Yeah, s'pose you're right'

Mary an' Joe ain't got no money so they have to ponse a donkey, an' go dahn Bethlehem on that.

They get to this pub an' Mary wants to stop, yeah? To have her bay-bee an' that.

But there ain't no room at the inn, innit? So Mary an' Joe break an' enter into this garridge, only it's filled wiv animals. Cahs an' sheep an' that.

Then these three geezers turn up, looking proper bling, wiv crowns on their heads. They're like `Respect, bay-bee Jesus', an' say they're wise men from the East End.

Joe goes: 'If you're so wise, wotchoo doin' wiv this Frankenstein an'
myrrh? Why dincha just bring gold, Adidas and Burberry?'

It's all about to kick off when Gabriel turns up again an' sez he's got another message from this Lord geezer.
He's like 'The police is comin an' they is killin' all the bay-bees. You better nash off to Egypt.' Joe goes 'You must be monged if you think I'm goin' dahn Egypt on a minging donkey'

Gabriel sez 'Suit yerself, pal. But it's your look out if you stay'.

So they go dahn Egypt till they've stopped killin the first-born an' it's safe an' that.

Then Joe and Mary and Jesus go back to Nazaref, an' Jesus turns water into Stella.
'Appy Crimbo!

“What would the world be without colour? A dull, joyless melange of shapes without meaning.” – Litten, J.

Many people don’t understand the impact colour has on our physical body and on our emotional states. It can happen wherever we are; home, work, school etc.

For example, walk into a playschool and most likely you’ll notice a lot of bright colours on the walls.  These colours stimulate brain functioning and make learning more fun.

However, scientists have found that colour isn’t just used to brighten up a room; it is actually mood altering. The effects of colour can be drastic!

Researcher, Robert Gerard, experimented by flashing red, blue, and white lights at test subjects. When the subjects looked at the red light, their blood pressure, breathing rates and the amount of sweat on palms all increased, as did the frequency of eye blinks. When the subjects looked at the blue light, blood pressure dropped, as did the amount of eye blinks and breathing. Gerard found that colours with longer wavelengths (the warm colours: red, yellow and orange) hype us up, while shorter wavelengths (cooler colours like blue, purple and green) calm us down.

Color Wheel
Here are some universal associations with basic colours:

Blue

Because peaceful, tranquil blue causes the body to produce calming chemicals, it is often used in bedrooms. It is believed that blue slows metabolic activity. Blue can also be cold and depressing or pain relieving. People are more productive in blue rooms. Blue enhances clear thinking, diligence and organization.

Green

Currently a popular decorating colour, green symbolizes nature and is the universal healing colour. It is the easiest colour on the eye and can improve vision. It is a calming, nourishing, refreshing colour. Hospitals often use green because it relaxes patients. Clear perception, self- recognition, and compassion are associated with green.

Red

The most emotionally intense colour, red stimulates the heart to beat faster and breathing to increase. Red also increases metabolic activity. As red is the colour of love, it is often used as an accent colour in decorating. Decorators say that red will attract attention. Self-motivation, leadership and generosity are some qualities of the colour red.

Yellow

Cheerful, sunny yellow is an attention getter. While it is considered an optimistic colour, most people lose their tempers more often in yellow rooms, and babies will cry more. Why? Yellow is the most difficult colour for the eye to take in, so it can be overpowering if overused. Yellow enhances concentration and speeds metabolism. Communication, observation and analysis are some attributes of yellow.

Black

Black is the colour of authority and power. Black also implies submission. Priests wear black to signify submission to God. The qualities of black include self-sufficiency, individualism and protection.

White

White is associated with light. As such, it is often linked to goodness, innocence, purity and virginity. It is also considered to be the colour of perfection. When used with intention, white can represent a successful beginning.

Purple

Purple has long been associated with royalty. It strongly symbolizes power, nobility, luxury and ambition. It conveys wealth and sometimes hints at extravagance. Purple is also associated with wisdom, dignity and independence. It is a powerful colour in enhancing creativity, mystery and magic.

Well, my room's purple and white, so I guess that's why I'm such a creative person who aspires to achieve a lot ;)

But, in relation to the title, just imagine how boring the world would be without colour...

Why don't we ever see the headline "Psychic wins Lottery?" - Question Answered!

Okay, so earlier, I posted 10 questions that I want to have answered before I die.

Click here to see the original post

One of these was the question "Why don't we ever see the headline 'Psychic wins Lottery'?"

Well, one of my good friends has just answered this for me! (It's a very good answer too if I'm honest) So here it is:

4. Why don't we ever see the headline "Psychic wins Lottery"? - because 'psychics' don't actually possess supernatural powers; they push thoughts and effectively use illusions.

There we have it. Simple, yet very true! I still have another 10 questions yet to be answered, so if anyone has these answers, feel free to comment!

Saturday, 22 December 2012

Questions I hope to answer before I die...

1. Who did let the dogs out?

2. What is the way to Sesame Street?

3. Why doesn't Dora just use Google maps?

4. Why don't we ever see the headline "psychic wins lottery"?

5. Why is Lemon Juice made with artificial flavours, yet dishwasher tablets are made with real lemons?

6. Why is the needle sterilized for a lethal injection?

7. If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a "hearing"?

8. Why do "Twinkle-Twinkle Little Star" and "the alphabet" have the same tune?

9. Why did the chicken really cross the road?

10. What is "normal"?

11. Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

12. What is the point of the "Windings" font?

10 things I love about Christmas...

In no particular order...

1. Food - when else is it okay to eat everything you possibly can fit on a plate, then go on to eat a big piece of Christmas cake and THEN nibble on sweets and crisps all day?! Okay, so you put on twice your original body weight in a week, but it's all worth it ;)

2. Secret Santa! - It never ends up staying secret, but it's so much fun! It's also okay to buy the most ridiculous gifts for your friends. Plus, everyone gets something, but you only have to buy one gift each.

3. Peeking under the tree - Come on, no matter how old you are, everyone does it...

4. Wrapping presents - I love making them look pretty with ribbons and bows! It's only going to get ripped off, but it's nice to know that I spent time on it...

5. Putting up the tree - It makes you feel festive several weeks early!

6. Waking up really early - You never want to wake up at 6am in the morning at any other time of the year, but suddenly at Christmas, it's okay!

7. Spending time with the people I love - It's not every day that you get to spend time with nearly every member of your family, and all f your closest friends. Plus, it means lots of parties ;)

8. It's okay to wear red and green together - MAJOR colour clash at any other time of the year, but at Christmas, it's "festive".

9. Watching rubbish T.V - Everyone complains about rubbish daytime T.V throughout the year, but make it Christmas themed and everyone wants to watch it... ALL DAY!

10. Christmas films! - Elf, Love Actually, Home Alone... Christmas films are

Top 10 guilty pleasures - the little (and sometimes embarrassing) things that get me through...

In no particular order:

1. Nandos - I could live of the stuff... I'm a Mango & Lime sort of girl ;)

2. Chocolate box competitions - at Christmas, everyone has a big tin of chocolates, but why not make it competitive by having someone describe the wrapper, and you have to know the exact name of the chocolate? (Roses and Quality Street are quite similar!) Surprisingly, you can get a good hour of entertainment out of this, and I actually get REALLY competitive...

3. Wrapping presents - it's a great boredom killer, and I love to put ribbons and everything on them so they look pretty! :D Also I'm really quick at it, so I think I'm secretly an elf.

4. Doctor Who - call me a geek if you like. David Tennant and Matt Smith are my favourites by far...

5. Bubble Baths - Spending ages in a really deep, hot, Bubble Bath, with music playing fairly loudly.

6. Guys with an Irish accent - for me, this is THE sexiest sound on earth. I could just sit and listen to them all day... except those really annoying chirpy ones, like Jedward, who I just want to punch in the face.

7. Watching Michael McIntyre DVD's - I've seen them several times, and they never fail to make me laugh! Plus, he has two boys, with the same names that I always wanted to call my children if I had boys... Lucas and Oscar (aww)

8. Hugh Grant - YES, he plays the same character in every movie he's in, but I actually find him quite attractive, even when he does his terrible dance moves... put on a film with him in, and I'm happy ;)

9. Back Massages - I think everyone loves a good massage! I also really like the feeling when someone cracks my back.

10. The Pain of Stretching - it's a surprisingly satisfying sort of pain! Take it from a dancer.